Amber Eboni 8/27/22 Amber Eboni 8/27/22

Episode Nine Transcript - The Butterflies on the Concrete Podcast : What got me Through The Week?

(Audio for this podcast can be found under the Podcast Tab on the navigation menu)

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Welcome to the Butterflies On The Concrete Podcast: What Got Me Through The Week? This week I want to talk about the band, Paramore. I’ve been a fan since around 2008, around the same time I started watching Korean dramas, actually. But while my loved one introduced me to Korean dramas, the way I found out about Paramore was quite different. I was looking at their label, Fueled by Ramen’s website because someone I had a crush on at the time told me about a different band I can’t even recall now, and I was trying to learn more about it. In the end, things didn’t work out with my crush, but that day, Paramore caught my eye, and I’ve loved their music ever since.

I was initially drawn to their album Riot! because of its relatable songs about romantic relationships like “For a Pessimist, I’m Pretty Optimistic,” “That’s What You Get,” and “crushcrushcrush.” And then I fell in love with “Brick by Boring Brick,” from their album, Brand New Eyes, and another song - one of their most popular songs, also from that album -“The Only Exception,” which is a song that I used to listen to while aspiring to experience those feelings. Now that I’m older, though, the songs that resonate with me the most come from their two more recent albums, their self-titled album which came out in 2013, and After Laughter, which came out in 2017. Those songs, which deal with the reality of life and hardships in life in general – whether from relationships or the pressures from society at large – are what I’m going to talk about today. They’re the songs that I probably listen to the most, the songs from this band that have helped me the most.

I do want to start out by saying that the beauty of music is that for every listener a song can mean something different. For the songs I’m going to discuss, the way I view them and how I describe the ways in which these particular songs have helped me, might be different from the artist’s intended meaning of the songs, or be different from how another listener might interpret it.

Now, let’s get start with some of the songs I’d recommend from their self-titled album. All the lyrics mentioned are taken from Spotify or Genius.com, and were written by Hayley Williams and Taylor York, with one exception, “ Anklebiters,” which lists Justin Meldal -Johnsen as a co-writer according to Genius.com.

The first song I’ll talk about is “Daydreaming.” In general, I tend to view learning to be content with life as a good thing. I think it’s important to be grateful for where you are, and not take things for granted, because your current situation might be better off now than it was in the past. And I’ve learned from experience that life can always get worse, not just better, so having gratitude and finding happiness in your current situation is definitely important. However, with that said, I think it’s safe to say that when you’re going through a difficult season in your life, or if you’re dissatisfied with certain aspects of your life, it’s normal to wish you were somewhere – anywhere- else. Whether it’s you reminiscing about a different, happier stage of your life from the past, or longing for an unknown future that you imagine would be less painful, or sad, or scary than your current harsh or uncertain reality. And so, for me, that’s what I personally interpret this song to be about. Some of my favorite lyrics from it are:

“I wanna get out and build my own home

On a street where reality is not much different

From dreams I’ve had, a dream is all I have...”

And “It’s not that I won’t remember where I’m from

Just don’t want to be here no more...”

That feeling of wanting to escape your current reality, the way it’s captured in this song is so very relatable.

The next song is, “Ain’t It Fun.” Hayley and Taylor won a Grammy for this song and rightfully so. I remember listening to it on my way to work when it first came out and grooving to it, because it speaks the facts of adulting so bluntly in an upbeat song. I’m a big fan of sad or cynical or sarcastic lyrics with a good beat, the juxtaposition of the two, really feeds my soul. Like, yeah, this is just the truth, thank you for telling it in this way. They verbalized how I think so many of us feel about life, we think being an adult is going to be one thing, and then we enter adulthood and learn it’s not what we imagined it to be. Many of the support systems and structure we once had are gone, friendships fade as everyone goes on their own separate paths and run towards their dreams that they might make a reality, or might fail at terribly. It’s hard making new friends, moving to new places and adjusting on your own. My favorite lyrics from the song include, the chorus, which I’m sure you already know, but I’ll say it anyway…

Please bear with me all of these lyrics are going to sound way better when Hayley Williams sings them as opposed to me saying them. So I apologize for that in advance. But, the, so, the chorus of “Ain’t It Fun” is:

“Ain’t it fun? Living in the real world. Ain’t it good? Being all alone.” Because the answer is no, clearly, it’s not fun. It sucks.

And, also, “Ain’t it good to be on your own? Ain’t it fun? You can’t count on no one. Ain’t it fun? Living in the real world.”

Because that’s just very much how life is. It’s hard to find people you can rely on, and sometimes it’s hard to be the person others rely on if there’s no reciprocity. Some people are really good at making friends and maintaining those friendships but I’m terrible at it and so there are very few people who I feel I can count on and I value them tremendously. Quality over quantity is my goal now that I’m older, whereas when I was younger I thought quantity and being accepted by others was more important and I didn’t really know how to build a lasting connection with others either so I ended up with friendships that were lacking a solid foundation, and were less strong, because of it.

The song “Last Hope” has gotten me through so many moments of self-doubt and confusion as I’ve tried and failed to chase after my dreams. I’ve just sat and listened to it over and over again, trying to keep myself going, to have that mustard seed of faith and not give up even though I realized I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing with my life. Especially on those days when just making it through another day seems tough and feels like a victory. The lyrics are just so raw and honest, and beautiful as a result of that sincerity. Some of my favorite parts of the song are:

The opening lines, “I don’t even know myself at all

I thought I would be happy by now

The more I try to push it, I realize

Gotta let go of control…”

And then the chorus, of course:

“It’s just a spark

But it’s enough to keep me going

And when it’s dark out, no one’s around

It keeps glowing.”

I mean, I love the next part, too, the whole song is incredible. Listen to it now, please, if you haven’t heard it before, or if it’s been a while since you’ve last heard it. As I worked on this episode, I realized just how much I’ve learned about navigating life from this song and some of the other songs I’ve discussed and will be mentioning shortly. Like, I really grew up with these songs, and the perspective they’ve given me on how to keep moving forward and keep processing the randomness and the joy and the cruelty of life is really remarkable. It’s so powerful now that I’m talking about it and thinking about just how much I’ve relied on this music. It’s amazing that this band has created this music that’s so life changing. Truly. I’m so grateful that they exist.

“Anklebiters” is a song that has become more and more relevant to me as I’ve gotten older. It starts with the line, “Why do you care what people think?” And then the pre-chorus and chorus continue spitting straight facts with:

“Fall in love with yourself

Because

Someday you’re gonna be the only one you’ve got…” (repeated twice, followed by)

“Why you wanna please the world and leave yourself to drop dead?

Someday you’re gonna be the only one you’ve got.”

I used to view what the chorus meant differently than I do now. Initially, I just took it to mean that I should focus and strengthen my relationships with the people closest to me. After I lost the person closest to me years later, though, the song’s meaning changed for me, because like… even those closest to you won’t always be there for you, even if they want to be, because life is so unpredictable, and therefore it’s important to learn how to become self-sufficient and to love yourself fully and live without the opinions and limitations that other people may try to place on you. You might someday literally be all you’ve got in this world, a very sobering thought. So, of course, enjoy other people’s company and make meaningful relationships, but also learn how to be okay on your own, not limiting your vision of what your life can be out of concern for other people, or because of what someone else told you was or was not possible, and know that you *can* be okay on your own, if necessary, because life could force you to be alone - or put you in a season of isolation - whether you want to be or not.

The last song that has helped me a lot from this album, is “Future.” Some of its lyrics are:

“I’m writing the future, I’m writing it out, loud

We don’t talk about the past

We don’t talk about the past now.”

And

“So, just think of the future

Think of a new life

And don’t get lost in the memories

Keep your eyes on a new prize.”

It sort of follows the same theme of “Daydreaming,” in my opinion. The hope that the future will be better than the present, you just have to hold on. Again, this song has been on repeat for me over the years.

The album After Laughter came out at a time when my loved one was in the hospital, a few weeks before they passed away. And that was a devastating time in my life, filled with sorrow and stress and despair, but the songs on this album helped me feel understood and less alone during that difficult time in my life which I’m still healing from even now. I don’t think anyone ever really gets over losing a loved one, instead it stays with you and becomes a part of who you are as time goes by. There are several songs I’ve held onto from this album, but because I’m afraid I’ve already been talking too much, I’ll narrow it down to just two.

The song “Fake Happy,” is so wonderful. It made me feel seen. The chorus is absolutely everything, and I quote,

“Oh, please, don’t ask me how I’ve been

Don’t make me play pretend

Oh, no, oh what’s the use?

Oh, please, I bet everybody here is fake happy, too.”

It’s another song that’s super upbeat with what sounds to me like somewhat sarcastic lyrics.

It makes me think of Ariana Grande’s song, “Fake Smile” and Jensen McRae’s “Happy Girl.” That theme of society expecting you to put on a façade of happiness for the comfort of others even if you don’t feel happy. How many times have you said “you’re fine” when someone asks, “How are you?” Even if you weren’t actually okay, you know? I’ve found people rarely want to know how you’re actually feeling, they just ask as a courtesy. It’s more acceptable to pretend to be happy instead. “Fake smile” is more so about being determined to express your true feelings in spite of that expectation. “Happy Girl” is acknowledging that expectation and trying to begrudgingly fit into it. And “Fake Happy” in my view is a mixture of both. Playing along, knowing you’re not happy but since it’s something everyone does, you just go along with it, even at the risk of hiding those sad feelings even to yourself, sort of being disingenuous about social expectation in a lighthearted way.

Lastly, the song “26” has gotten me through some of my lowest moments. The lyrics of the chorus are literally what I’ve needed to hear in order to get by, and they have healed me so many times:

“Hold onto hope if you got it

Don’t let it go for nobody

And they say that dreaming is free

But I wouldn’t care what it cost me.”

And,

“Reality will break your heart,

Survival will not be the hardest part

It’s keeping all your hopes alive

When all the rest of you has died

So let it break your heart.”

That acknowledgment of how tough life can be, and the encouragement given to us, the listener, to hold onto life and not give up in spite of life’s hardships, no matter what, is just incredible songwriting. I love Paramore and their honest and sincere portrayals of life often paired with an energetic and fun beat, or head banging guitar riff, or an acoustic melody that makes you feel something even when you’ve gotten used to feeling numb. And Hayley’s voice is a God given talent, so powerful and flawless on the record, and then when she sings live somehow it’s a billion times better, when it was already perfect.

I believe they’re touring this fall and so I’m anticipating and looking forward to news of a forthcoming album whenever they’re ready to release it.

Thank you so much for taking the time to listen to this week’s episode. If anyone is listening to this and would like to talk more about how much they also love Paramore, or the ways Paramore’s music has helped improve their lives, or want to share something else that got them through the week, I want to know! Please comment on this episode’s post on our Instagram page WhatGotMeThroughTheWeek, or send an email at whatgotmethroughpodcast@gmail.com. The transcript and audio for this episode will be posted on HyssopandEbony.com.

Until next time!

Amber Eboni 8/19/22 Amber Eboni 8/19/22

episode Eight Transcript - The Butterflies on the Concrete Podcast : What got me Through The Week?

(Audio for this podcast can be found under the Podcast Tab on the navigation menu)

Welcome to the Butterflies On The Concrete Podcast: What Got Me Through The Week? This week I want to talk about my favorite Korean drama, Find Me In Your Memory. I started watching it on a whim while it was currently airing back in 2020, and it remains a show that I can rewatch with excitement each time without getting tired of it.

Find Me In Your Memory stars Moon Ga-young, who portrays the female protagonist, Yeo Ha Jin, a famous actress, and Kim Dong Wook, who portrays the male protagonist, Lee Jeong Hoon, a renowned news anchor.

When I started watching this show back in 2020, I thought it was my first time seeing Moon Ga-young act, but it turns out she was Jung Yong-hwa’s sister in the drama, Heartstrings,an older show which I really loved and would recommend. As for Kim Dong Wook, he was a supporting character, one of the coffee shop employees, in the classic, hit show, Coffee Prince, which I highly recommend as well, and this show was my first time seeing him in a lead role. I think I first watched it on the KOCOWA app, but it’s also available for streaming on the Viki app as well.

The premise of Find Me In Your Memory appears to be straightforward on the surface - a top star falls for a news anchor. However, what makes the show more interesting is that the news anchor, Jeong Hoon, has a medical condition where he remembers absolutely everything in his life while the top star, Ha Jin, has a terrible memory and is very forgetful. After Jeong Hoon interviews Ha Jin, somehow a rumor spreads that they’re dating, which she doesn’t refute because he’s piqued her interest. He reluctantly agrees to pretend to date her so that news of a breakup won’t ruin the release of her new movie, but as she tries to get closer to him, he tries to distance himself away from her. Ha Jin starts out getting a lot of hate because of the types of characters she plays in dramas, but with the new movie role and the dating rumors her image improves. When Jeong Hoon suddenly receives threatening mail related to his fake relationship with Ha Jin, he finds himself in a situation that’s similar to what he experienced in the past when he lost his first love, and that’s when he makes a crucial decision that he shouldn’t be *avoiding* Ha Jin, he should be *protecting* her. It’s from there that their love truly begins to blossom.

There’s so much more to the plot, but I don’t want to spoil it for first time viewers. It’s so well written that each and every scene has a clear purpose, building and strengthening their relationship with expert precision. Ha Jin has a bright demeanor despite having a painful past. Jeong Hoon is a man with a strong sense of responsibility after losing his first love.

Ha Jin’s sister, played by Kim Seul-Gi who was also fantastic in the drama, Oh My Ghost,is such a great character I want to highlight her for a moment. She’s funny because Ha Jin always posts on social media at inconvenient times, or dates haphazardly, or says the wrong thing in interviews, and it’s an interesting dynamic because she’s a younger sister acting as her manager, who works alongside her older sister having to scold her, or clean up her mess with her entertainment agency.

Another person I’d like to highlight is Yoon Jong-Hoon, who was really great in the more recent drama Shooting Stars, and plays the male lead’s psychiatrist best friend in this show. Their bond is noteworthy.

At this point I want to discuss some of my favorite aspects of the show and my favorite episodes so there will be spoilers ahead. Don’t say I didn’t give you proper warning :) Okay, so, let’s get started then.

The details in this show are really poignant and impactful. In particular, that Jeong Hoon can’t drive in the snow because his memories take him back to the day he saw his first love die. His girlfriend’s death is absolutely heartbreaking and her stalker’s actions are truly terrifying. So creepy that I don’t know if I would be able to watch the actor who portrayed that character in anything else without thinking of how chilling and frightening his behavior was. To watch Jeong Hoon as he relives such painful memories is just gut wrenching. So, so sad.

Find Me In Your Memory sometimes is a thriller, and at other times a romantic comedy. It’s an emotional rollercoaster in some ways, but it’s cathartic. You’ll likely cry at some moments, I certainly did.

It’s difficult to determine which of the people closest to Ha Jin is the stalker. It’s filmed in such a way that they all seem suspicious and so it keeps the viewers interest piqued. And there are often several plot points being developed at once which helps to keep the viewers always guessing about what will happen next. Those plot lines are:

-#1-The relationship between leads (Will Jeong Hoon ever reciprocate Ha Jin’s feelings? Can he move on from the love he shared with his deceased girlfriend, and start over with someone new given his condition?)

-#2-Will connections from the leads’ past hinder their present?

-#3-Who is Ha Jin’s stalker? (Will she be okay? Can Jeong Hoon protect her?)

-#4-Will Ha Jin’s memories return?

-And lastly, #5, is the stalker Jeong Hoon knew from the past orchestrating the present?

Episode 8 is worth discussing because that’s when Jeong Hoon receives the first set of troubling photos in the mail which prompts him to run towards Ha Jin. He was very cold and distant towards her before this and so this episode stands out to me because he no longer hesitates to be with her, even if it’s just out of concern for her safety.

Episode 12 is another favorite episode of mine because it shows notes Ha Jin made about Jeong Hoon’s work. She shadows him for a drama role, and observes him carefully, his likes and dislikes, his mannerisms, that he’s the first to arrive and last to leave work, how he interacts with his coworkers, and she follows him without him even knowing and writes it all down. Her love for him is very sweet, and genuine. She wants to be closer to him and he finds her notebook and reads her notations. She later says that she wrote these things because she, and I quote, “wants to remember everything about him.”

Another favorite scene from Episode 12, is when Ha Jin takes a photograph with Jeong Hoon’s mother because they’re so in sync with one another. They sometimes say the same thing to him and you can tell the mom adores Ha Jin even though they’ve only just met. It’s really heartwarming, and meaningful for their relationship development in the plot. Also, in episode 12, Ha Jin learns about Jeong Hoon’s condition and tells him, I’ll paraphrase, that part of her is envious of him, but also not envious at the same time. And that’s exactly how he felt after he found out about her medical condition.

Episodes 18 and 19 are when we learn the stalker’s identity, and when she’s abducted right after he agrees to go to dinner with her for her birthday. His mom wrote a letter to him saying that “she wishes for him to be happy and that he’ll protect whatever is precious to him.” And Jeong Hoon looks so worried when he finds out Ha Jin’s been taken, and then he does his best to investigate her case, and then locate and save her. The reveal of the stalker is so slow and eerie, first we see him walking towards her, then we see the breakfast he’s made for her, after we learn the first suspect identified by the police was wrong. And like the viewer, Ha Jin is in total shock when she finds out who it is, too.

Episode 20, we see that Ha Jin is scared because in the past Jeong Hoon was nice to her, then he further distanced himself away from her and said goodbye. Luckily, this time, Jeong Hoon promises to be with her no matter what. He says he’ll stay with her until the end.

I loved it in Episode 21 when Ha Jin and her sister scream with joy together after the younger sister finds out Ha Jin and Anchor-nim (what Ha Jin calls Jeong Hoon) are officially together. Their sisterly bond is so special. In this episode Jeong Hoon also helps Ha Jin with her lines and says the drama that she’s starring in is unrealistic because – and I quote - “they meet 3 times in one day, miss each other by a second, then get into an accident,” while Ha Jin says that that means they’re fated to be together.

In Episode 23, we learn why Ha Jin was so tormented in the past, and she starts to remember more about her friend who passed away, which ultimately threatens to ruin her relationship with Jeong Hoon.

That’s the farthest I’m going to go in discussing spoilers for this show…The rest you’ll have to experience yourself. Hopefully this has encouraged anyone listening to watch or rewatch Find Me In Your Memory, because it’s certainly worth your time.

Moon Ga-young and Kim Dong Wook actually made a cameo as Ha Jin and Jeong Hoon in the drama, Shooting Stars, which I mentioned earlier. It was such a nice scene showing them still together and, honestly, I would love it if there was a sequel showing the next stage of their relationship together. They just have such beautiful chemistry together.

Thank you so much for taking the time to listen to this week’s episode. If anyone is listening to this and would like to talk about how much they also love Find Me In Your Memory, or wants to share something else that got you through this week, I want to know! Please comment on this episode’s post on our Instagram page WhatGotMeThroughTheWeek, or send an email at whatgotmethroughpodcast@gmail.com. The transcript and audio for this episode will be posted on HyssopandEbony.com.

Until next time!

Amber Eboni 8/13/22 Amber Eboni 8/13/22

Episode Seven Transcript - The Butterflies On the Concrete Podcast: What Got Me Through The Week?

(Audio for this podcast can be found under the Podcast Tab on the navigation menu)

Welcome to the Butterflies On The Concrete Podcast: What Got Me Through The Week? This week I want to talk about Instant Dream Home, a home design show airing on Netflix, and The Sims 4. A home renovation show and a life simulation game might seem like two very different things. However, to me, they complement each other perfectly.

So, let’s get started!

Instant Dream Home is probably the most creative home design show I’ve watched yet. A small team of experts in carpentry, exterior design, interior design and other relevant fields work together along with about 250 craftspeople to renovate homes in just twelve hours! The homeowners featured on the show are nominated by people close to them, a relative or friend, who then finds an excuse to keep them out of their house for a day, so that they can come home and be surprised later on. The show is hosted by Grammy Award and Screen Actors Guild Award winning actress and performer, Danielle Brooks, who’s also designated as the Team Leader. I want to mention also that one of the experts, the interior design expert, more specifically, is Adair Curtis, which is awesome because I absolutely loved the show Styling Hollywood and I’ve been patiently waiting for it to be greenlit for a second season. Because of this, it was really cool to see him in this new project. I hope Instant Dream Home gets a second season, and even a third season, as well.

There are truly some amazing things that happen during Instant Dream Home. As an avid viewer of HGTV - who has no personal home renovation experience or relevant skills for improving a home - the idea that walls could be knocked down and rebuilt, kitchens and bathrooms could be added to homes, and entire backyards could be fully transformed into a homeowner’s dream, in less than one day, is absolutely unfathomable. I watched it, and I still can’t believe it. It’s unheard of, at least to me. But I watched them build kitchens and bathrooms offsite and then attach them to existing homes with forklifts and cranes. They were able to knock down walls and then create new rooms. They air-lifted balcony windows onto a roof with a helicopter! And built a treehouse with a camper van and a crescent shaped basketball court. I thought I’d seen it all when it came to home renovations because I watch those shows all the time, but I was wrong. There’s so much I didn’t know was possible that I learned while watching this show.

Another aspect of the show that I really enjoyed was how extremely diverse it was. It’s the first home renovation show I’ve seen where the majority of the homeowners were people of color. People might not think that viewers notice that sort of thing, but we do. Well, at least some of us do. Being able to see yourself reflected in the media is something that should never be taken for granted, and I’ll always appreciate and seek out content that understands how important that is.

These sorts of shows aren’t just about improving homes though. They also show brief stories about the people who are receiving the home, and a lot of them were people who helped and gave freely to others. A firefighter, a teacher, a nurse, pastors, a community worker, someone who works at a nonprofit. Regardless of who received a home makeover, it would be a joyous occasion, but the happiness is multiplied when you realize that recipients are mostly people who typically give more than they receive in their daily lives. Seeing people get surprised and so excited and grateful about their new home just made me feel happy for them. It gave me hope. A reminder that good things are still happening, even when this world may seem chaotic at times.

And when life feels overwhelming, I play The Sims. It’s a game I started playing when I was in high school, and then forgot about once I went to college. I didn’t start playing again until the pandemic started. I can’t remember if I saw an ad for it, or if I just started googling wondering if it still existed randomly one day, but once I found it, I got hooked yet again. When I was younger, I think it used to just be something I viewed as a fun way to spend my free time. And as an adult, it’s still fun. However, the difference now is that I’m more cognizant of why I enjoy it than I was back then.

When I’m stressed out, or anxious, or sad, I can regain some semblance of control in my life by thinking of something I want to build, or characters that I want to create for a particular story that I yearn to tell, and then bring it to fruition in the game. I can make a retail store, or a vet clinic, or a spa, or cafe, designing it just the way that I want it. And there won’t be any self-conscious thoughts about whether I’m playing ‘the right way,’ because there is no one specific way for the game to be played. It’s a single-player game, so there’s no need to rely on anyone else, and there won’t be anyone commenting on my gameplay, or judging it. Its just a save file that I’ve created, on my own terms, that can’t be criticized by someone else as not being good enough. I don’t need to worry about anyone else’s opinion, just my own. And it’s so immensely comforting because - even though it’s a life simulation game- it’s unlike the real world in that way.

I absolutely love it. And the excitement that I feel when I’m building homes for, and guiding the lives of, my Sims, is unparalleled.

My favorite aspect of The Sims is not simply building businesses for my Sims to visit or own, it’s building homes for them to live in. That’s the connection between a home renovation show and a life simulation game that I alluded to earlier, as small as it may be. Building a home, designing and decorating it is just so much fun. Whenever a pack is announced, whether it’s an expansion, game or stuff pack, or even a kit, my first question is – what are the build/buy items like?

Because I’ve watched so many home design shows, there are certain items we haven’t gotten yet in game that I’d really like to see:

1. New standalone showers, like the kind we got with Snowy Escape, but with ceiling mounted rain shower heads;

2. Waterfall countertops for kitchen islands;

3. Small appliances like toasters, under counter microwaves, waffle makers, juicers, air fryers, blenders, and food processors all with new food items added;

4. Backsplashes for kitchen walls that can be added on top of whatever wall paint or wallpaper is used;

5. Wall mounted double ovens, and

6. Spiral staircases.

I’m not currently playing with custom content, and I’ve mostly played without it since I downloaded the game again back in 2020. However, when there was a drought of new content last fall through earlier this year, I did download and use some custom content items from Harrie and Felixandre, along with a few other creators like Ravasheen and Myshunosun, and so I know that some of the items I mentioned above are custom content. In particular, the double ovens that Harrie created are awesome. I just truly wish that EA would hire the creators I mentioned, and other skilled custom content creators, so that their items could be part of the game for everyone, not just those who choose to use custom content or mods. Not everyone wants to use custom content, and even I only used it sparsely, avoiding anything with script files just to be safe.

Some of other features that I’d love to see added to the game are as follows:

1. Bands. I’d love to see new instruments like the flute, the trumpet, and drums added to the game, as well as the ability to play songs as a group with a lead singer, and with instruments, and maybe even dancing. A singing career would also be great, perhaps as a refresh for Get Famous or City Living.

2. Ballet. There’s ice skating in the game so I’m not sure why they couldn’t also add ballet as some aspects of the movements are similar.

3. Hotels. They gave us rental properties, but not the ability to own them. And they gave us apartment buildings, but not the ability to own them again. We also have the ability to lock specific doors on residential and other lots. So I’d appreciate a hotel even if it’s one that can’t be owned, as long as we can customize and/or demolish and rebuild it. It’d be great if they could do that with apartments also. If the Sims team gave us a hotel lot type and an apartment lot type though, where we can build them and maybe even own them, that would be a dream.

4. Being able to have multiple businesses on one lot is something I think would enhance my gameplay so much. It’d be nice to have a retail store and a restaurant on the same lot. Or, a spa and a gym, or a café and a residence. I’m not sure if we’ll ever get it, but I think a lot of people want that feature. Not just me.

The Sims isn’t a perfect game. There are endless bugs that need to be fixed, and cross pack integration could certainly be improved. But, even so, I’ll continue playing the game regardless because it brings me joy. Nothing in this world is perfect, but all of us do our best to keep going anyway.

Thank you for listening to this week’s episode. If anyone is listening to this and would like to talk about how much they also love Instant Dream Home, or The Sims, or want to share something else that got you through this week, please comment on this episode’s post on our Instagram page WhatGotMeThroughTheWeek, or by email at whatgotmethroughpodcast@gmail.com. The transcript and audio for this episode will be posted on HyssopandEbony.com.

Until next time!

Amber Eboni 8/6/22 Amber Eboni 8/6/22

Episode Six Transcript - The Butterflies On the Concrete POdcast: What Got Me Through The Week?

(Audio for this podcast can be found under the Podcast Tab on the navigation menu)

Hello! Welcome to the Butterflies On The Concrete Podcast: What Got Me Through The Week? This week I want to talk about Lollapalooza! This was my first year watching the festival and I was not disappointed. The artists that I would like to discuss are Tinashe, Griff, and the main event, Sunday’s headliner, J-Hope! I’m grateful that I was able to watch it all on Hulu!

Tinashe’s featured on Calvin Harris’s new song, ‘New To You’ along with Normani and Offset, and it’s a song that I really like, plus I enjoy some of her older songs, too, including her feature on the Far East Movement song called ‘Freal Luv,’ so I decided I wanted to watch her perform! I consider myself more of a casual listener of Tinashe’s music so I only knew of the single, ‘Bouncin,’ off her latest album, 333, but after watching her performance I definitely want to check out more of her newer songs. She’s an incredible artist. She’s the total package, really. She sings well, she dances well, and I could tell she really loves performing, and the audience was really into it as well. She really shines on stage, and so I’m glad I got a chance to see her set.

Griff is someone I started listening to during the pandemic. I randomly turned on the Brit Award show last year on a whim and she won the Rising Star Award. She also performed her song, ‘Black Hole,’ and after I heard that I knew I had to listen to more of her music. I think the lyrics are supposed to be very exaggerated in that song, but the lines in the chorus, which are, and I quote, as written by Griff, Frederik Eichen and LOSTBOY according to Genius.com:

“There’s a big black hole where my heart used to be

And I tried my best to fill it up with things I don’t need

It don’t work like that, no, it’s not easy

To fill the gap that you left in me.”

Those lines really, really resonated with me. It’s how I was feeling at the time, still in the midst of grief, and I’ve since made peace with the idea that it’s probably how I’ll always feel going forward. Anyway, a number of her songs helped me get through last year. I’d recommend her whole mixtape, entitled, One Foot In Front of The Other, but in particular, the title song, as well as ‘Walk’ and ‘Heart of Gold,’ in addition to ‘Black Hole.’ Her performance was really cool to see. I wasn’t able to see her on tour earlier this year because I’m still being cautious about crowded events because of covid, so I’m happy I could see her on the Lollapalooza livestream. She’s extremely talented and I look forward to seeing her career blossom even more in the future.

The only reason I even considered watching Lollapalooza this year was because of J-Hope, from BTS. I first got curious about BTS after seeing them perform ‘DNA’ on the American Music Awards back in 2017.

It was rare back then to see Korean artists on American TV. I remember staying up late to watch CL perform on James Corden’s late night show just a year prior with my loved one, the person who introduced me to Korean dramas and started me on this journey towards loving both Korean dramas and Korean music, and back then it had felt like a really big deal, so for me it was even more fascinating and more exciting to see a Korean band perform at an awards show. I didn’t know much about them then, but it was how I discovered them.

After the American Music Awards performance,I started listening to more of their music casually, particularly ‘MIC Drop,’ and now, however many years later, I’m someone who randomly sings ‘Burning Up (Fire)’ and ‘00:00 (Zero O’Clock)’ when I’m washing the dishes. I’m someone who gets excited about seeing their posts on Instagram and on Weverse, who looks up translations of their Instagram stories on Papago as needed, and makes sure that I add their new songs to my personal Spotify playlists so I can stream consistently. For example, I’ve been listening to ‘Bad Decisions,’ which was just released with four of the members, Snoop Dogg and Benny Blanco, along with J-Hope’s new album, Jack In The Box, and the album, Proof.

In other words, I’m a fan. I still haven’t watched American Hustle Life yet, and I haven’t seen all of the Run BTS! episodes, and I have some of their cds, but I don’t have a lot of merch so I’m not sure if I’d be considered true Army by the more devoted fans, but I love and enjoy their music. I’ve heard the saying in the fandom that BTS’s music finds you when you need it, and it’s true. After losing my loved one, they certainly have helped me heal with songs like ‘Spring Day’ and ‘Magic Shop.’ I’m indebted to them for that. And their music comforted me while I was in the pandemic, you know, isolated, too. I know they comforted so many of us with their music and content during that time. Their online concerts, music releases and television performances truly brought me so much joy, and I’ll forever be grateful to them and want the best for them because of this, no matter what.

Factoring all of that in, there was no way I would miss J-Hope’s debut solo stage at Lollapalooza once I heard that I could stream it on Hulu.

His album, Jack In The Box, is fantastic. My favorite songs from it are probably ‘What if…’, ‘= (Equal Sign)’ and ‘Safety Zone.’ J-Hope has such a bright personality that it took this release for me to get a better sense of the other aspects of his artistry. I know he previously released Hope World but for some reason I never really considered doing a deep dive into it, or the other rap line mixtapes. I’m slightly embarrassed by this because now I’m obviously behind and need to go back and listen to his older music, but I can say that with this release, I’m learning more about him as a solo artist beyond ‘Just Dance,’ ‘Ego’ and ‘Chicken Noodle Soup.’ Also, if you haven’t watched him on IU’s Palette yet, I would recommend you watch that interview on YouTube.

The chorus for ‘Safety Zone,’ which was written by J-Hope and Pdogg, according to the English translation on Genius.com is, and I quote:

“Where is the ray of light for relief in the dark?
A peaceful home? Or is it a distant blue?
Where’s my safe zone?
Left, right, go straight?
What’s my safe zone?

Here? Over there? or X?”

There’s something so extremely relatable about this song and these lyrics. For me, personally, its hard for me trust people these days, outside of my immediate family, and building new, genuine relationships and friendships takes time and can be difficult, and it can be exhausting, feeling like you don’t have someone you can rely on, or confide in, or somewhere to go to find a sense of peace outside of God. Once again I’m able to gain strength from a song like this because in some ways it seems as if some semblance of these emotions I’ve described might be felt by even the most amazing of people, not just someone as average as me. We’re all just trying to navigate life as best as we can.

J-Hope’s Lollapalooza performance has been uploaded onto YouTube now which is a blessing because, honestly, I would’ve bought it on DVD for however much they offered it for, so it’s nice that they’re letting us view it on YouTube for free. If you haven’t watched it yet, I think you should stop listening to this and go watch it. It was iconic. I couldn’t stop thinking and talking about it even days afterwards. It blew me away and impressed me in ways I wasn’t expecting, because I wasn’t sure what to expect. I just knew he’s a great performer so I thought it’d be a great show. It turned out to be even better than that – it was outstanding.

I actually wrote down my initial thoughts right after watching his Lollapalooza performance and so here’s my full, immediate reaction:

J-Hope has made his official transition to solo act look so effortless. As far as I’m concerned, after watching his stage presence - which I already knew was good but damn it was electric, and totally phenomenal at this show – he was born to be a solo act in my mind now. The media and some fans seemed understandably upset about BTS pursuing solo work instead of prioritizing group work. Obviously, they’re still a group throughout all of this, but like…. I remember after the announcement people seemed worried, whereas I wasn’t completely surprised, though I was hoping for a world tour before they posted the video about it. Anyway, it turns out that there’s no need to worry at all.

This performance proved at least one thing, in my opinion - the most important thing - and that’s that this next phase of BTS isn’t the end of anything. Instead, this scenario is a win/win for everyone. The members can pursue what makes them happy, Hybe as a company now has seven separate artists that we as fans will wholeheartedly support so they’re only going to make more money in the long run, and then we as fans are going to get even more content, while getting to know the members better as people and individual artists.

I’m OT7, but in general, if asked, I would say Jimin is my bias, and V is my bias wrecker. But now, after Lollapalooza, I’m calling J-Hope my bias wrecker. Like, my favorite artist from BTS keeps changing because each member has their own charm, and I just adore all of them and I can’t wait to hear more of what they’re going to do in the future. I’m so proud of J-Hope, it’s very clear that he put his heart and soul into his album Jack In The Box and the promotions for it. I’m also so excited about what the future will bring as he continues to grow as an artist, and as the other members continue to grow as artists as well.

If you couldn’t tell already, I was truly captivated by J-Hope’s performance and as a BTS fan, this has shown me that I still have so much more to learn about the members and who they are as artists and people. That’s my goal going forward, to just keep learning and discovering more.

Thank you so much for listening to this week’s episode. If anyone is listening to this and would like to talk about how much they also loved his performance or any of the other performances at Lollapalooza, or share something else that got you through this week, please comment on this episode’s post on our Instagram page WhatGotMeThroughTheWeek, or by email at whatgotmethroughpodcast@gmail.com. The transcript and audio for this episode will be posted on HyssopandEbony.com.

Until next time!

Amber Eboni 7/28/22 Amber Eboni 7/28/22

Episode Five Transcript - The Butterflies On The Concrete Podcast: What Got Me Through The Week?

(Audio for this podcast can be found under the Podcast Tab on the navigation menu)

Welcome to the Butterflies On The Concrete Podcast: What Got Me Through The Week? This week I’ll be discussing the Netflix drama, Remarriage & Desires!

The premise of this drama is pretty simple. The synopsis mentions a wife who takes revenge on her husband’s mistress, and that is the heart of the plot, but this show is not at all what I expected. It’s short but written so intricately, that it keeps you wanting more. We’re given just enough, never too much information, and though a few aspects of the subplots are left unraveled in the end - with regard to some of the side characters, the main threads of the plot are tightly woven into a fantastic story. I watched it on a whim, not expecting anything at all, and then I ended up rewatching it, and now I’m hoping that there will be a second season. I usually enjoy watching lighthearted romantic comedies, or romance shows, revenge shows aren’t my typical go-to programming, but on occasion I come across a show like this that’s just so wild, it captivates my attention regardless of genre and I can’t help but want to talk about it!

The story begins with a man standing on top of a skyscraper and the female lead driving while being unable to reach the person she’s calling. The man stands there and then we see someone push him off of the building and suddenly the female lead wakes up in bed. It turns out that what we saw was a nightmare. Next, we see people arrive to seize her property and confiscate all of the items in her home. She asks them to at least leave her car, but it looks like they spare nothing inside of it. In the trunk, she notices some sort of scoresheet, where golf scores are written down, and we see her husband’s name and another name, Jin Yoo-Hui. In a flashback, her husband says that he has to go golfing even though it’s his birthday, and then the female lead realizes that there are golf balls with her husband’s initials and his mistress’s initials on them as well. In voiceover, the female lead, tells the audience essentially that her life was tough, but she thought the worst of it was behind her. As the show goes on, we learn that she has many more challenges that need to be overcome.

Eventually we see that the female lead’s husband asks her for a divorce and admits that he has another lover. At first, she’s reluctant to give him what he wants, but ultimately she agrees because she doesn’t want to stay in a relationship with someone who doesn’t truly love her. This show usurps all expectations though, so it turns out that the woman he has an affair with actually doesn’t want him. Instead, the woman he had an affair with ultimately betrays him, slandering his name and pinning the blame on him for embezzlement to save herself. In a short amount of time, he loses his mistress, his job, and, ultimately, his wife and daughter because of the divorce. As a result of this, he decides to take his own life.

This story is unlike any show I’ve watched before. The female lead’s mom sells her wedding ring to pay the ten million won cost for her daughter’s membership to an elite matchmaking service called, Rex. The female lead insists on getting a refund, because she has no thoughts of getting remarried, but then she sees her husband’s mistress at the matchmaking company and changes her mind. She wants to know why the mistress is there, and who the mistress wants to be set up with. And at this point I thought the plot would be about the female lead chasing after the man that her husband’s mistress wants so that she can obstruct and ruin her efforts to achieve her dream of marrying rich and living happily ever after. Instead, the female lead’s only real desire throughout the show is to reveal the truth about what happened to her husband because of the mistress’s actions, and thwart the mistress’s marriage goals that way. It’s more palatable in a way, and I think it’s a more satisfying approach for the screenwriter to take. The female lead resists wanting to get remarried and she resists the advances from the male lead and the second male lead, her first love, for most of the show. And so they pine over her and clearly want her, but she’s super uninterested and that builds a lot of the tension between them.

The female lead character is Seo Hye-seung, and she’s an adjunct professor at a Korean university, played by actress Kim Hee-sun. I think I first watched Kim Hee-sun in the drama, Wonderful Days. The male lead, Lee Hyung-ju, is the CEO of a mobile game company, and the actor Lee Hyun-wook plays his character. The actress Jung Yoo-jin does a masterful job playing the mistress, Jin Yoo-Hui. I truly was frustrated and upset with her character as a viewer, and since her character was the villain, that means that she did a fantastic job. Luckily, I’ve seen her in other shows before like Romance is a Bonus Book and Snowdrop, so it isn’t to the extent where I won’t be able to watch her in other shows because of it.

I want to talk about my favorite parts of the show and what I’d like to see explored if there’s a second season, so I’m letting you know now that there might be spoilers ahead.

No surprise that since I like romance shows, what stood out to me the most in this drama was the relationship between the female lead and the male lead. He picks her out of everyone after they meet at a masquerade party arranged by Rex, and if the CEO of the matchmaking company hadn’t diverted his attention to two other women, including the mistress, I think they would’ve gotten together much faster. I wasn’t sure if there was a male lead in the show at first, and I definitely wasn’t sure if she’d find love at all, but then their relationship starts to become more of a possibility after she becomes a tutor for the male lead’s son. Hye-seung becomes a mother-like figure to Hyung-ju’s son, and someone Hyung-ju’s mother appreciates because of her academic background and the stellar results from her tutoring. In Episode Five, when she realizes Hye-seung is in close proximity to the male lead, Yoo-hui tells him lies about Hye-seung, slandering her character, and Hyung-ju confronts Hye-seung because of it - asking if she approached him on purpose. This prompts Hye-seung to say that she’ll quit after Hyung-ju’s son takes his exams, and his mother and son are furious with him because of this. They demand that he get her to return to work immediately. This makes him think twice about the bad rumors he’s heard. We also see him discuss Hye-seung with the second male lead, her first love and ex-boyfriend, Professor Cha Seok-jin, who works at the same university Hye-seung teaches at. He’s also a reluctant member of the Rex matchmaking service. Seok-jin tells Hyung-ju that he knew her in college, and explains that the masquerade party wasn’t her scene, and that she went there only to say something, she wasn’t there to find a man, and because of this Hyung-ju realizes that he misunderstood Hye-seung. He invites Hye-seung out for a meal and then apologizes and asks her to return. She says she’ll think about it and then tells him a story – about how her entire life was ruined because of one of the women at the masquerade party - but she leaves out who the woman was… She tells him that she wants to, and I quote, “destroy her at her happiest moment.” Hyung-ju mentions that his loneliness after his divorce and his wife betraying him, lessens when he’s out in nature, and Hye-seung is surprised that someone wealthy like him feels lonely at all. He answers that while it appears as though he has everything, ultimately he has no one to share it with. He then offers her a car, like he bought a car for her, but she refuses to accept the gift. Overall, it feels sort of like a first date.

My favorite episode is probably Episode Six because there are quite a few memorable moments between the leads. The first notable moment is when Hye-seung goes to Hyung-ju’s yacht with her daughter and his son to celebrate his son’s test scores. They look like a happy family celebrating together and Hye-seung and Hyung-ju seem like a perfect fit. We never get any romantic or intimate scenes between Hye-seung and Hyung-ju, the closest we ever get are Hyung-ju helping Hye-seung stay upright when she almost falls when they’re on the boat. Still, you can tell by his actions that he cares for her. For example, he seems jealous when he sees her on a date with Seok-jin later in the episode. And then, at another part, he asks her why she and Seok-jin broke up and then wonders aloud if she’d be willing to consider him as a potential suitor instead. When he sees her response, or lack of one, rather, he acts as if he’s joking, but we all know that he wasn’t. And then he helps her to reveal what Yoo-hui did in hopes that she won’t be able to ruin anyone else’s life in the same way that she ruined Hye-seung’s. There are more moments between them, but I’ll hold off on mentioning the rest of them so that I don’t spoil it.

All I can say is that if there’s a season two, I would really like to see their relationship be developed more. We’re given just enough interactions to fulfill a romance component to this drama, but it’d be nice to see them happy and living well together. If they’re happy, you may be wondering what sort of conflict would there be in a second season then, right? But, there are some other aspects of the show that could be expanded, those unraveled threads that weren’t properly tied up in season one. In regard to their relationship though, it would be nice to see how the mother in law truly feels about them as a couple. She liked Hye-seung up until she realized Hyung-ju wanted her. Once she saw Hyung-ju’s interest in her, and that she might cause people to gossip over their relationship, the mother expressed her disapproval and asked Hye-seung to stop tutoring her grandson. That’s the only conflict regarding their relationship that I would be open to seeing in a season two. Otherwise, I just want more romantic moments to be honest.

That doesn’t include company issues though. In a second season I’d really like to find out what exactly happened with Hyung-ju’s company after Yoo-hui tried to sabotage him by aligning herself with his friend. This friend wasn’t truly a friend because he seemed eager to want to gain control of Hyung-ju’s company, but we never fully get a resolution about what happened between them, and how or if he managed to stabilize and maintain control of his company after the fact.

I’d also like to know more about the congressman’s close confidant, Go Ae-ran. She mentions wanting revenge but we don’t get much of a backstory about that, and so I think a season two could explore that storyline more in depth.

Another aspect of the plot that I’m curious about is if Seok-jin, who was given an opportunity to marry Hye-seung if he agreed to give up his inheritance, truly did agree to give up his inheritance. Although he doesn’t marry her, he said he was going to, so does that mean that he can still keep his inheritance, or did he forfeit it and then still not get married to the woman he loved? It looks like his stepmother, the CEO of the matchmaking company, did gain control of her husband’s company because she seemed to be closing her matchmaking company in the end. However, it’s unclear if that is actually the case. After all, her husband could recover from his illness, and there was the mysterious person who arrived at the very end of the show asking her not to close her matchmaking service. Her background is also something that we could learn more about, because the CEO of the matchmaking company was difficult to read. I could never tell if she was on Hye-seung’s side, or Yoo-Hui’s side. She seemed like a complex character who would have a fascinating backstory. With so many questions left unanswered, I’d love to have these issues addressed in a second season.

One last thing I wanted to discuss was how unpredictable this show is at times. I watched in awe each episode as Jin Yoo-Hui became greedier and greedier until ultimately she lost everything. She was a successful attorney. Her life could’ve turned out quite differently if she’d made different choices. Her character appears to be a manifestation of the phrase, “Hurt people, hurt people.” Her father, the congressman, never really acknowledged her existence, because she was born out of wedlock and for a politician - image is everything. And while none of that excuses anything that happens, her story remains one of the aspects of the plot that could be explored in a second season.

Let me highlight just a few of the outrageous and scary things Yoo-Hui did in the name of greed – while trying and failing to win Hyung-ju’s affection: Telling rumors to Hyung-ju’s ex-wife, causing the ex-wife to demand the female lead be fired as a tutor, having the man who confessed the truth about what she’d done to Hye-seung’s husband kidnapped and thrown into the ocean causing his untimely demise, arranging a car accident for Hye-seung’s daughter on her daughter’s birthday, and then threatening her father, the congressman, so that he’ll arrange for an impromptu tax audit for Hyung-ju’s company, which she’d already put into peril by convincing Hyung-ju’s friend to try and take over Hyung-ju’s company.

Do you think there could be a redemption arc for her character somehow? If so, what would that look like? Do you think she’ll ever feel even a hint of remorse for anything that happened during this show? Part of me highly doubts it based on the way the screenwriter wrote the last scene that we’re given with her character, but still, I’m curious what the screenwriter would do with that sort of story arc. It doesn’t seem like the story that the writer is trying to tell, but I do think that with a show like this anything is possible.

Personally, I’d prefer having more happy moments with the lead couple shown in a second season instead, paired maybe with a battle for Hyung-ju’s company, and details about Go Ae-ran’s revenge, or learning more about the matchmaking CEO’s next steps. But, we don’t even know if a second season is a possibility yet, so we’ll just have to wait and see.

Thank you for listening to this week’s episode. I hope that you’ll watch Remarriage & Desires if you haven’t yet because it’s probably the wildest show I’ve seen in years. I haven’t asked myself, “What did I just watch?” repeatedly throughout an entire show since I saw the drama Last Empress. I don’t know if it’s technically a makjang drama, but there are definitely some aspects of it that come pretty darn close. If you have watched this drama, please let me know what moments you enjoyed, and what you would like to see happen in a second season. Also, if anyone is listening to this and would like to share what got them through the week, please comment on this episode’s post on our Instagram page WhatGotMeThroughTheWeek, or by email at whatgotmethroughpodcast@gmail.com. The transcript and audio for this episode will be posted on HyssopandEbony.com.

Until next time!

Episode Nine Transcript - The Butterflies on the Concrete Podcast : What got me Through The Week?

episode Eight Transcript - The Butterflies on the Concrete Podcast : What got me Through The Week?

Episode Seven Transcript - The Butterflies On the Concrete Podcast: What Got Me Through The Week?

Episode Six Transcript - The Butterflies On the Concrete POdcast: What Got Me Through The Week?

Episode Five Transcript - The Butterflies On The Concrete Podcast: What Got Me Through The Week?

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